14th March 2012
Dear Mr Warren,
I remember it very clearly. I was at the dentists. I was six years old. He leant over me, the crooked old man, and put his hands in my mouth and said “Don’t move please” – and I took him so literally that I haven’t moved since. The government carried me away to do some tests on my cerebrum, and they got all worried that I was some kind of paradigm...you know...like I’m too early or something, my type of human being might not be a commonplace ‘til say, a thousand years from now or something. Strange, innit?
Regards,
The Abministrator